Thank you again for joining us here in the ‘Real’-ationship Series. In our last broadcast, we busted some myths for my friends, Kita and Tara, and invited them to bring their voices to the party.
We were having an interesting conversation the other day, one that I guarantee doesn’t apply to you (or any other man, woman, or child on the planet), right? It’s about how sometimes your throat tightens up when you want to say certain things, but then you remember that you’re not supposed to talk.
I invite you to watch this week’s video to step into your greatness and open up that throat of yours!
Of course, it happens to all of us at some point. And it often stems from an experience we had when we were younger. For Kita, it happened when she was 6 or 7 years old. She decided, for whatever reason, “I need to keep my mouth shut.” Maybe it was because she thought her words were too offensive, too dumb, too harsh, or simply that nobody cared enough to listen. She made that rule as a little girl. And guess what? She’s been living by it ever since.
It’s a common story—many of us create rules when we’re young to protect ourselves. Maybe someone told you that you were too loud, too bold, or too much, and you believed them. You made a rule, and that rule shaped how you showed up in the world. But here’s the kicker: that rule was made by a child.
Sure, it served you then. Maybe it helped you stay out of trouble or avoid confrontation. But is it serving you now?
Let’s be honest: those rules are outdated. Just like we once believed in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy, we believed in rules that no longer apply. And guess what? We managed to let go of those childhood myths. So why can’t we do the same with these old, limiting beliefs?
Think of it like cleaning out your closet. You know how good it feels to get rid of the clothes that don’t fit anymore? Oprah once said if you haven’t worn something in two years, it’s time to let it go. And when you do, you make space for something new, something better.
It’s the same with the rules you created when you were younger. They don’t fit who you are today. So why hold on to them?
Here’s the thing: you’ve already let go of things from your past before. So you know it’s possible. The challenge is recognizing what no longer serves you and making the conscious decision to replace it with something that does.
One of the key takeaways from our recent conversation with Kita was recognizing when those old feelings start to creep in. When you walk into a room and feel the urge to stay quiet, ask yourself: Is this serving me today?
That realization can hit you like a ton of bricks. The full-grown woman you are today is more than capable of handling the things that the little girl inside you wasn’t able to. It’s okay to let that little girl rest. You don’t need to keep playing by her rules.
Now, let’s talk about that 6-year-old Kita. The one before she made the rule to stay quiet. She was bold, fierce, fun, and unstoppable. She was who she was without a care in the world. Remember her?
What if you went back and got parts of her that would serve you today? Because here’s the truth: you didn’t have to let her go completely. She’s still in there. In fact, that playful, carefree version of yourself is still very much alive. You just have to invite her back into your life. And here’s the exciting part—when you do, it’ll change how you show up. In your career. In your relationships, and even with your kids.
Think about it. What if that bold, fierce, playful version of you showed up tomorrow with your children? They’d probably think you’d lost your mind, but you know what? They’d love it. They’d love seeing that side of you because it’s genuine. It’s real. It’s you.
So, here’s your assignment: stop holding on to the rules that were created by your younger self. They served a purpose back then, but they’re not helping you now. It’s time to let go, just like you let go of believing in the Tooth Fairy.
Recognize that it’s possible to bring that playful, fun, unstoppable version of yourself back into your life. And not only is it possible, but it’s necessary if you want to truly thrive. You’ve done it before—you’ve let go of things that didn’t serve you. You’ve cleaned out your closet and made space for new things. Now, do the same with those old rules that are keeping you silent. You’ve got too much to say and too much to offer, to keep quiet any longer.
Go ahead. Speak up. Be fierce. Be bold. Be the full version of yourself. You’ll be surprised at how liberating it feels to show up as you—without the rules, without the fear. You’ve got this!
Come on guys, let’s be loud for this one! Tell us something about yourself in the comments below so we can all start to exercise our voices.